Brown Nuggets

Very Sure

I told him that I wasn't sure.
He said that not sure was okay.

I said I didn't want to disappoint or jump into things at this age.
He said he is old enough not to waste time and is usually rather direct when he likes someone.

I said thanks anyway for letting me know and that it would give me something to think about.
And now he's going for a marathon because he knows I like guys who are fit.

But I have thought about it and I realized that I am no longer unsure...

I am sure. Very sure I will never like him.
At least not in that special way.

I do like him as a friend of course.
We have great conversations and we enjoy hanging out together.
But I don't feel anything for him.

It's not even about looks or how successful he is.
So what if he's a Pilot? Crew? Engineer? Trainer? Doctor? Businessman?
What difference does it make?

Sometimes, you're instantly attracted to certain people...
and I must say it happened a lot more frequently when I was younger. Is it in his voice? The things he say? The way he speaks or laughs or teases you? I haven't quite figured that part out...

Anyway, you almost always pray really really hard that he feels the same way about you and senses the same connection. It rarely happens both ways but then, that's life. The ones you don't like, like you and the ones you like, don't.

Sometimes (hopefully not too often), you are momentarily blinded by the fact that he may be a loser but eventually you wisen up.

And then there are others... but no matter how much time you spend together or how hard they try, you never fall in love...

It's the lack of chemistry. And it is not over-rated.

I'm telling the same story all over again.
I just want to be friends but is that enough for him?

I like him enough to not want him to waste his time.
I just want to be fair and kind to him. Can I do both?

I feel bad but I should tell him soon.

posted by Pocahontas @ 7:58 PM