Brown Nuggets

Get a Life?

I think I'm boring, judgemental and uptight.
Was I always so or did I somehow become like that while growing up?

I hate the smell of smoke - I don't date smokers.
I don't enjoy loud parties/crowds or hanging out late at night.
I don't take stupid photos and throw myself all over guys at clubs.
I don't like to go out in big groups and get all rowdy and drunk.
I don't want to. But why are cute guys always so wild?

I am irritated by people who lack discipline.
I am irritated by careless and scatterbrained hares.
I can't stand people who talk too much or swear.
I can't stand people who are needy and attention seeking.
I dislike people who borrow money and pretend to forget or delay repayment.
I dislike people who are negative, judgemental (yes i do realise that is exactly how i sound right now), always gossiping and criticising others.
I dislike girls who are always flirting and trying to seduce men.
I can't stand irresponsible and defiant people.
I can't stand people who are unteachable.

Yes I do understand that these people probably had a hard time growing up and have issues that have not been dealt with, but so do I, and I'm sorry but my heart is simply not big enough to accommodate their idiosyncrasies.

I smile easily but I have lost the ability to laugh at retarded jokes.
I am no longer easily impressed by guys and I scoff at their lack (of everything).
Their awkwardness, inappropriate behaviour and lack of confidence is disturbing.
Their need for someone to pat them on the back to say well done all the time is too much to ask.
There is always something (often many things) wrong with them.
I am terribly cynical when it comes to relationships.

Why do people love so easily? What do they see in their partners?
Do they really love wholeheartedly and passionately or are they merely settling out of desperation, fear of being lonely or the desire to start a family? Are they more concerned about conforming to social expectations than their own true happiness? Have they weighed the pros and cons and decided that it is better to have someone they can live with than no one at all?

Those with low self-esteem cling on to their partner even though they are ill-treated. Why?
Those who cannot stand being single and are only happy when they are attached. Why?
Those who desperately want a partner but refuse to pull themselves together. Why?
Those who fight, breakup, get back together only to fight, breakup, get back together again. Why?

Could it be that only the blind fall in love, get married and live happily ever after? Or are they merely "better" people who have attained "nirvana" and are able to love and accept despite obvious shortcomings.

Yes, I know. I'm evil, selfish and proud and if I end up collecting dust on the shelf, it's my own bloody (Gasp! A swear word!) fault. But at least I'll be happy.

posted by Pocahontas @ 6:54 PM